Why Would Kristie Noem be off Trump's VP List?

Are we to believe that shooting puppies is a bridge too far for MAGA and Trumpism? Color me skeptical

Overthrowing a U.S. Presidential election by concocting unfounded lies about conspiratorial election fraud is fine.

Harassing and threatening to kill court officials and election workers is totally a-okay.

Doxing and stalking random transgender folks and making their lives a living hell is no big deal.

And who hasn’t stormed the Capitol building in D.C. and smashed windows and beaten down doors during the Electoral Count Certification, and marched through the corridors shitting all over the walls and floors? (“Boy, am I glad there weren’t cell phones back in my day, documenting every little transgression I committed”).

But, shooting puppies? I think we can all agree that this is stepping way over the lines of decent civilized society. Don’t want to scare away the moderates. Right?

Well, this is what everyone wants to believe at this point in time. But what no one seems to be suspecting is that we are likely at another inflection point in reality. There have been several of these during the Trump era, where we inexplicably took the route of the bizarre alternate reality, like the one that Marty explores in Back to the Future II, when Biff is a rich and powerful casino and entertainment magnate (kind of a Trump-esque figure, coincidentally).

Why would we go on the more straight-line path this time?

Mars Attacks

I’ve gotten to the point where I truly believe that we would not be able to come together to ward off an alien attack. One side would see that there’s an alien attack and that we should combine resources to combat it. The other side would deny it was happening, suggest it’s all a staged hoax funded by George Soros, and claim there’s no reason to close the schools even for a few days to get our bearings.

Why would I not believe this? We’ve been through Trump’s 2016 election despite damaging evidence of misogyny, Russian interference in our political system, the Covid pandemic, and the Jan 6 insurrection. After a millisecond or two of unity, these situations quickly deteriorated into base political advantage-seeking. It turned out they simply didn’t matter any more than a simple policy disagreement about taxes would matter.

So now we are to believe that the whole country is united against puppy shooting and will not waver from this principled stand? Color me skeptical.

Sure, it makes sense that no politician could ever want to associate with someone that shot their puppy, and proudly admitted it to promote their book. According to Rolling Stone, Trump has reportedly been frequently complaining about Kristie Noem’s puppy statements, and questioning her “political acumen” and “grasp of public relations”.

Yes, the guy that openly talks like Hitler and complains daily of how chilly a courtroom is while shaking a stack of papers full of right-wing media propaganda in reporters’ faces is apparently concerned about Noem’s political and public relations skills.

Sources of Discontent

Rolling Stone’s reporting on Trump’s campaign has been solid and seemingly well-sourced. There’s no reason to completely discount what they have reported. But it’s good to be a little skeptical and ask some questions.

For one thing, why would this be getting leaked right now? Mostly for obvious reasons, such as the conventional political assumption that most Americans are disgusted by puppy-shooting. They want to make sure that Trump is on the right side of the electorate on this.

But some of the sources themselves explain that that reason they are talking is largely because they don’t want Noem as VP and can’t stand her close adviser/lover, Corey Lewandowski. This is from the Rolling Stone article:

Some of the sources candidly said they were disclosing these private details because they want Noem permanently eliminated from Trump’s 2024 vice presidential shortlist, or because they despise Corey Lewandowski, Trump’s former 2016 campaign chief who has advised Noem for years.

They go out of their way to use language that suggests that Trump is simply not okay with shooting puppies, and would be nothing other than disgusted by the prospect. So much so that he’s bringing it up all the time:

Some separately said they were discussing this simply because Trump had been talking about Noem’s puppy slaying so frequently that it was, in the words of one of the sources, “getting kind of ridiculous” how “disgusted” the former president sounded about this and how much he has been “taunting” Noem behind her back.

In recent days, the former president has discussed or brought up Noem’s pup-execution in closed-door meetings, as well as over the phone. Trump, sources recount, has pointedly asked questions regarding her decision to kill the dog, including specifically, “Why would she do that?” and “What is wrong with her?” He has expressed bewilderment that she would have ever admitted to doing this, willingly and in her own writing, and has argued it demonstrates she has a poor grasp of “public relations.” In these various conversations over the past week, the ex-president has also mentioned that voters generally don’t like politicians who kill dogs, two of the people familiar with the matter add.

Wow, Trump must really not like puppy-shooting OR: Trump really must not think puppy-shooting is good for being elected. See how normal and decent he is? OR: See how in tune with voters he is?

This could be nothing more than trying to get out to the public how Trump is like the rest of the country, and is quite normal in his affinity for dogs, and boxing him in on a Noem VP decision. This is despite his past rhetoric on dogs, which plays quite a bit like someone that would love to shoot them.

He has repeatedly used disparaging dog analogies to describe humiliating or distressful circumstances. For example, people were often “choked like a dog”, “sweated like a dog”, or “fired like a dog”. Not exactly the kind of language a dog-lover would use. Or even a dog-tolerator.

Dead or Alive

The article’s sources also suggested that Noem’s VP prospects are dead as a result of this fiasco. But there hasn’t been an official decision from Trump at this time. Not even a hint of one from any of these sources. They just assume she’s no longer on the list.

And wouldn’t you know it, there’s a new report from Business Insider that Trump is still speaking fondly of Kristie Noem:

Former President Donald Trump isn't completely ready to abandon South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem amid the uproar over her disclosure that she killed her 14-month-old dog named Cricket decades ago.

Trump effusively praised Noem and other potential vice-presidential picks during a closely watched Mar-a-Lago fundraiser over the weekend, according to audio of the private event obtained by Axios.

"Somebody that I love," Trump said of Noem. "She's been with me, a supporter of mine and I've been a supporter of hers for a long time."

And why wouldn’t he be? This is what he’s always done, and what he will continue to do. And this is what MAGA does. They defy reality by concocting an alternate one, much like the exhausting activity of churning butter by hand.

Noem has been defiantly defending her puppy-shooting. MAGA wing-nuts have been testing out excuses. Sure, even right-wing media has been critical and openly challenging Noem on these facts. It just means they will be churning harder and faster.

Is anyone really going to be surprised if Trump picks Noem as VP? It will be another non-admission of guilt. The justifying logic that he was right all along, that she’s totally worthy of being on his list. He’ll make up reasons why shooting puppies is okay, or at least not disqualifying. Or completely never answer any questions about it, successfully ignoring it out of existence. We know the New York Times won’t be pressing him on this issue.

And if he does choose Noem, MAGA will go along with it and fully support it. And the media will stop covering it. And the rest of us will look with wonder and confusion on yet another pointedly damaging controversy being spun out of our collective consciousness.

Soon after will be MAGA influencers bragging about shooting their dogs and posting videos on Xitter (pronounced “shitter”) of them doing it. In place of Bud Light cases will be cute little labrador retrievers. And there will emerge long-forgotten tales of how Ben Franklin and John Adams had to make the difficult decisions to shoot their puppies.

MAGA has been bending reality and decency at the behest of Trump for the past near-decade. Why would we pretend they won’t bend it even further now?